A kampung girl whose ultimate goal is to find man- even it jeopardises her life.

If I ever struck by psychiatric illness it is mostly due to my babysitter. After work, the not-so-good feeling will emerge as I will be facing her at home.

She is 27, very good with child, but tends to believe love is above all(including God). 

About three years back, she gave birth to a boy out of wedlock. A couple from Kota Belud fostered the child. She said she had to give up the child to pay the 'sogit' (local customs of penalising the people for going against the norms) and of course can't afford to raise the child on her own.

A year later, my mom recommended the girl who is also my distant cousin to babysit my then three-month-old baby. Of course, mom told me about what had happened to her but assured she was experienced in caring for children.

When she started working with me, I got shock during her off days she would ask to stay overnight at someone's places. It was on her first week of off days.

Frustrated. I complained to mom about how daring she was to behave that way. Didn't expect mom called and scolded her over phone. Not long after that, she called me to pick her up from nearby town.

Then only she spitted out her past which she claimed "get raped" by her boyfriend whom she willingly followed him home and had sex.

I asked why didn't she report it to police. Even shocking to know babysitter didn't even know the guy's full name.

She is petite...about the height of today's 10-year-old Asian boy with A cup size boobs. 

Facial feature is huge lips, large nose, fierce brows and square face which make her look older than her age.

It might not easy and lucky for her to find the One to walk the "only death do us apart" road (plus it is also difficult for some men to stay loyal).

However, from her stories on only got pregnant after having "uterus" massage indirectly indicated she might have more than once sex and could be multiple partners.

Her knowledge on sex in general is definitely out when:

• She only knew she was pregnant at 7th month. That was also after former employee forced her for medical checkup. Luckily, the baby is healthy.
• As mentioned above that possibility to getting pregnant is after uterus massage.
• Definition of rape.
• The danger of contracting infection and worse HIV via unprotected sexual intercourses.

There had been few times I felt like educating her on this matter. But, my fault for failing to execute it. 

Her desperation in men-hunting realised with the invention of wechat. A mobile application which enables users to search others using the app too.

Since her employment two years ago, she had been going out with at least six men. The latest is an old Chinese man, divorced with a grown up children, driving a Toyota Hilux and owns an air-conditioning services shop.

The man's status as a divorcee is already makes him a questionable good partner. Knowing that the guy always bring babysitter out to drink beer made me worried too.

There were few times babysitter said the guy brought her to meet his family members including the mother. Maybe it was a good sign that babysitter might find good partner...

Until recently, babysitter went home with swollen eyes. Complained the boyfriend strangulated her!!! She became even depressed after I told her I would report police if same thing happened to me.

Domestic violence is always a vicious cycle until police arrest the assaulter.

A man who beats a woman..before marriage..is a solid evidence that he is not a good man.

Unfortunately, she thinks and convinces herself it was just mistake over one time and will never repeat it again. My mom has the same thinking as hers...and the domestic violence is a vicious cycle even after their 30 years of marriage .

I just hope  God will grant her a good life and trustworthy man.